Just as we thought we had gotten over the worst of COVID19 here in Melbourne, we’re right back at square one. In fact I feel that this current lockdown is tougher than the first time we did it. Perhaps it was the tease of freedom we had or the frustration of people not doing the right thing. Or even just the combination of everything plus the added desolation and stress that work has thrown around. Either way it sucks.
Changing routines has had a massive impact on my diabetes management and my mental health. Working from home has meant being more sedentary during the day, meaning higher insulin resistance. My exercise and eating habits have also changed, which meant trying to figure how to manage my insulin doses around that. Stress, uncertainty and general moodiness equated to less motivation to do things, even diabetes management. Everything felt like a chore and forced.
Coming out of lockdown was something I approached with much trepidation. We started by dining out at our local cafes before venturing out to our surrounding suburbs and meeting up with other people. It was so good to be sitting down at a cafe again, catching up with friends and family over meals we didn’t cook. Everywhere we went, everyone made an effort to do the right thing by keeping their distance and sanitising everything.
Second lockdown hit me like a tonne of bricks. I am feeling incredibly worried with the rising number of COVID cases, feeling the panic and urge to sanitise everything I touch and mask up every time I’m out. I started getting a headache on day 1 of lockdown and later that night, dreamt that I had unknowingly contracted COVID and spread it to people I loved and places I often went to. By day 3, I knew I needed to take time out, rest and reset.
Today is day 4 and my stress headache has mostly subsided and I’m taking the time to focus on gratitude and kindness. I need to stop comparing myself to others, saying that I have nothing to be upset about or struggle with. Let’s start by being kind to ourselves. Each of our experiences are valid, albeit different, and we must acknowledge this. We’ve been through lockdown once, we can do it again for another six weeks. Support your local community. Do what you need to do to look after yourself.
My aim now is to prioritise my mental and physical health during this time and trust that everything else will fall into place. And thankfully, I have a cheeky kitten to keep me sane during lockdown at home.