There are times where you feel you work your guts out but aren’t seeing any results. Not just with diabetes but with life in general. So it’s nice to have someone reaching out to say to you ‘hey you’re doing okay’.
I’ve spent most of my week doing a lot of thinking and writing. When I draft up important emails, I consider every word carefully. I agonise over which 21 words to cut from my abstracts to stay within the 300 word count. After being at it for two hours and having 2 more words to cull is possibly the worst thing ever.
At least with writing, my outcomes are something I can clearly see.
But with diabetes, the only outcomes I can see are my blood tests or BG levels.
It can be so frustrating when you’re doing all you can and your stubborn sugar levels won’t budge. It is disappointing when you go collect your blood test results and nothing has changed or things have gone worse even after all that effort.
Perhaps this is why we focus so much on numbers in diabetes – because they’re outcomes we can clearly see. There are no numerical outcomes for our mental or emotional health apart from psychometric tests and screening tools that are really only used for research or clinical purposes. We don’t routinely fill out these tests in our own time to see how we’re going.
It can be quite despairing when things are tough and there seems to be no relief in sight. A comfort that I have learned to rely on though is talking to others about what’s happening and how I’m feeling. A bit like a debrief. Sometimes, that’s all I need.
I am grateful for the people in my life who provide me with support and encouragement when I feel lost or stuck. Not just around my diabetes management but for pretty much every aspect of my life. They encourage to keep swimming along and remind me of how far I have come. At the moment, that’s exactly what I need.