Under Pressure

Being 25, many of my peers are busy with their own little families and many more are in the stage of planning for one. So it’s no surprise that I am receiving and feeling a bit of pressure in fulfilling my “adult goals” too. Questions around when I will be “settling down” and having my own family is coming from all directions. And it’s all quite overwhelming and frustrating.

Never mind that my mum has been asking hinting at the lack of grandchildren running around in her life since I was 18. Thankfully she has eased up in the last few years but somehow passed it on to my grandparents. I can’t get through one phone call without hearing the usual spiel of needing to “settle down”, buy a house and have kids.

Being in the “prime age group”, I constantly receive and see flyers for seminars or events on having a healthy pregnancy by default. Maybe I need to stop being truthful about my birth year. Too bad I can’t hide that from my healthcare professionals who, from time to time, remind me that I have diabetes and am of childbearing age. Because there are days I forget that I have diabetes. Yep. Although I do forget I’m 25 at times. You’re never too old for Disney movies.

Obviously having diabetes plays a huge role in family planning. I know that. I remember when one of my endo’s sat me down for an hour talking about different contraceptives and how important it was for me to not have an unexpected pregnancy. It truly scared me and that fear is still with me today. Maybe that’s why there are times I panic about not having kids sooner rather than later (if any at all).

Having kids is now a topic I often talk about with some of my close girlfriends. Talking to them often eases my anxiety over the need to start a family in the next few months years (thank you). There are certain things that would need to happen before I would even consider the thought of bringing another human into the world. Only time will tell if my babies will include more than cats.